This time we were lucky enough to interview Lindsay. If you don’t know her, you should probably take a look. Lindsay has published two books already, writes her own blog and has traveled the world with amazing experience and advice to share.
- Do you have any specific memory of weird clients?
I can not call myself a prude woman. I had a boyfriend before that asked me wearing stockings in bed. I didn’t find it that difficult if that made him happy, why not. Also, I’m doing fetish modeling, so these kind of desires are not unknown to me. I don’t know why but I noticed lately that guys with secret fantasies sooner or later open up to me and tell me their dirty secrets. And I love those private dances when my customer only wants to give me a foot massage or lick the heels of my shoes and I don’t need to get naked! Probably the one who took me for a private dance and only wanted me to sit on his face was the weirdest. I’ve heard about that fetish before but when you meet someone who literally likes it, it’s different.
- What is the weirdest wish form a client you have received?
I had a customer with whom I had a good time. We were laughing a lot and opened bottles of champagne, one after another. Suddenly he just gave me his whiskey glass. “I want you to pee in it!” Probably the alcohol I drunk previously made the effect on me that I was not surprised. It’s definitely not something I do often. But that was one of the situations in my life when I chose to go beyond my limits. And he was only a customer I’ve seen first time (and last time), I mean there were no emotions attached. So I did it for him. He drunk it with no facial expression just like he’d drink his whiskey. He only asked for some ice to put in it.
- Biggest tip?
It was not my biggest tip but probably the most genuine one. Once in London, I had an American client. We had a great night, we talked a lot. He enjoyed my company and at the end of the night, he promised to come back the next day. I was doubtful as I’ve heard that promise before but rarely seen the guy the following days. Such a big surprise the next day! I arrived at the club and went straight to the changing room. Not long after the doorman knocked on the door. I opened the door for him and he handed an envelope to me. “What is this?” I looked at him suspiciously. “Do you remember the guy from yesterday? The American?” he asked “He was just here. He apologized but he has a business dinner and won’t be able to come back tonight to see you but he asked me to give this to you.” I opened the envelope and there was a £50 note in it. No card, no name, no phone number, just the money that equals the commission I would have made on a bottle of champagne. It was such a nice gesture and I felt special and appreciated. It’s not only about the money but these are the small things that can make a huge difference.
- How would your ideal client look like?
One of my favorite customers ever was a handsome Asian guy I met in South Africa. He was a young lawyer, surrounded with sheer elegance – well-educated, intelligent, very polite. His presence was a delight in those crazy days at that club. When he asked for my mobile number, I didn’t hesitate even though it was forbidden in clubs to give out our contacts. My rule is simple: Show me you are different and I will treat you differently! From time to time, we occasionally send a message to each other as friends, and years later when I worked in Macau, in China, I texted him and he came to visit me there. We had dinner together but unfortunately, the time was short as I had to work that night, but it was so great to see him again and see he hadn’t lost a bit of his charm.
- What is the most embarrassing song you have ever danced to?
German carnival music is not my favorite to dance to, but the worst song ever was the Happy Birthday song. One customer in the room had a birthday and the DJ was playing the song while I was performing on stage. It was impossible to dance and feel sexy so I ended up just clapping my hands.
- What would you change in this industry if you had a chance?
More respect and understanding towards sex workers. I’m a stripper and a writer. I write a blog (www.heartbrokenstilettos.com) and books about my experiences as a dancer (good and bad, but totally honest) and try to fight against the social stigma that we have to wear. I don’t want to make our work fancy and appealing to others to join but those that already work in this industry I wish to be more understood. When you watch some movies, we are displayed as alcoholic and druggies and girls with daddy issues, but our work, our life is more than that. I just want to show the society that we made our choices and have nothing to be ashamed of. With my writing, my aim is to show the world that we are not only strippers but talented, kind-hearted, hard-working individuals.
- Which country do you think is the best to work in from your experience?
Although the work conditions were not so great and the accommodation was terrible (I had a room without a window for three months) I had a really good time working in Canada. I worked with legal papers, I made my money and had the most amazing customers there, some of them until today are still my friends.
- How do you prepare for a shift?
I don’t have the rituals before work like others listening to meditation music or boosting their mood with a few glasses of drinks. But I’d like to enjoy a good cup of coffee in peace before I start my shift.
- Do you have any fears and what would be the biggest one?
As a frequent traveler, I always have that dark though in my mind that the things might not be the same when I arrive home as I left them. My mum is not getting any younger and my biggest fear is not being with her in a critical moment, although I’m fully aware that I have no power to change destiny.
- Your wildest dream?
I don’t have dreams, I have goals. My big dream was to travel to Japan and have been there already twice. I made my dreams come true as I traveled the world and collected lots of joyful moments. I did cage diving with the Great White sharks and went on a safari in South Africa, I visited the Niagara Falls in Canada, swam in the Blue Lagoon in Iceland, I celebrated the Chinese Moon Cake Festival in Macau. Every place I visited I tasted delicious local food. I was sunbathing under palm trees on beautiful beaches of the Caribbean, sailing on the sea, having wine at the cellars in Stellenboch in South Africa. I tried bungy jumping above the Corinth Channel in Greece and I walked under the blooming cherry trees in Yokohama during the sakura. If I hadn’t started dancing I would have missed out most of these memories. I was not born with a silver spoon in my mouth, I don’t have a rich family behind me, although my mum was emotionally always very supportive. But what I have, what I reached, I did it myself and am proud of it and don’t care if some put a social stigma on my forehead just because I live my life as I always wanted.
- Can we ask you to give advice on 3 most important things for dancers who have just entered this industry?
1. Choose the club that you want to work with very carefully. Collect as much info as you can before you start. If there is a strip club in your area, go there with friends and look around. Is this the environment you really want to work in?
2. If you are really an enthusiast, you can go to a dance class before you start the job. It’s great fun after all and you can hear useful info. Taking some pole dance lessons is giving you confidence when you are on stage at the first time. And just be yourself! Be flirty, bubbly, kind, optimistic and smiley!
3. Don’t tell all your friends and relatives that you intend to make money by dancing naked. People that never been involved in this kind of work don’t understand and you don’t even know yourself if you will like it or not. If it’s only a trial for you, better to keep it in secret.
- Advice for new dancers how to overcome fear and stress?
In our job, every stripper knows (indeed every sales person knows) that NO doesn’t mean to reject you, only the product or the service you offer. But in practice it’s difficult to deal with. 1 NO is okay, second NO is okay, 3-4 and you start to feel down, 5-6 or more and you end up sitting in the corner questioning yourself “What’s wrong with me?” or worst, crying in the toilette or in the changing room.
Some days I’m just lucky. It happened before that 2 am everyone was drunk and having fun and I didn’t make a penny. I already gave up on that night. I was sitting at the edge of the bar waiting to go home. Suddenly a guy arrived and came straight to me. “Hello, would you like some champagne?” Oh yes, please! Without asking me, he ordered an expensive bottle. He was absolutely nice, easy-going, chilled out guy and we had a great time. I had maybe 4 dances with him. Then he saw a girl that he knew so I invited that girl to our table. We had two more bottles of champagne and we ended up having 18 dances each. That was a good night for me although it didn’t seem to happen at the beginning
- If you could leave only one advice to this world:
Have your boundaries, stick to them and don’t let people cross them. Be true to yourself.
You can follow Lindsay and her work on:
Instagram – @heartbrokenstilettos
Books – Bedtime Stories from Stripperland and The Stripper and the Yakuza